


I'm The One (Who Can Deal With Everything You Are) [MXM Oneshot Collection]

by eyesofjihoon (taesquared)



Category: MXM (Band), Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Magic, Angst, Canon Compliant, Dongpaca, Fluff, M/M, Mentions of Other Produce 101 / Wanna One Boys, Minor Character Death, One Shot Collection, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-02-20 00:14:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13135131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taesquared/pseuds/eyesofjihoon
Summary: MXM / Dongpaca One-shot Collection.Because obviously these two need more love. At least as much as they have for each other.





	1. hit me with your best shot

**Author's Note:**

> It's honestly tragic how dry the MXM / Dongpaca tag is on here, so I'm here to help liven it up. :)))
> 
> Cross-posted on AFF: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1311366/i-m-the-one-who-can-deal-with-everything-you-are-mxm-oneshot-collection-mxm

**Canon-Compliant / Fluff / 493 words.**

*******

“Donghyun!”

Donghyun scurried down the hall, his fingers clasped tightly around a phone that belonged to none other than the fuming taller male stomping behind him.

“Donghyun, I swear…!”

Donghyun laughed as he ran, his high-pitched peals irritating the other to no end. Donghyun turned a corner ready to bolt towards the bedroom, but tripped – _Oh, fuck, no_ – giving Youngmin the perfect window of opportunity.

Youngmin surged forward and tackled the shorter boy with incredible strength and speed, causing the pair to scuffle a bit before Donghyun was on his back, a panting Youngmin on top, pressing his palms hard into his chest.

Youngmin leaned forward, warm breath ghosting across Donghyun’s cheek as he glared. “I swear, one of these days you’re really going to push me to the edge and by God, you best tell Daehwi and Woojin you love them before I murder you, you cheeky piece of shit.”

The corners of Donghyun’s lips curled upwards, teasing the boundary between an innocent smile and a devious smirk, which only frustrated Youngmin even more. He had suffered too many days figuring out whether Donghyun was naughty or nice, and frankly he was getting too old for this shit. “You’re such a fucking brat,” Youngmin said lowly, and Donghyun couldn’t deny how his chest thumped rapidly from the other’s closeness.

Youngmin swiped his phone from Donghyun’s grasp and quickly stood up. He reached a hand out to help Donghyun up.

“Come on.”

Donghyun held up his arm ready to be hoisted up when Youngmin quickly yanked his hand back, forcing Donghyun to fall on his back once again.

“Ah!” Donghyun yelped, grimacing as his back hit the ground. “Ah, hyung…” he whined, and equipped his favorite weapon: the sparkling eyes. The younger coupled the eyes with the pout and Youngmin quickly turned away to avoid the two-combo attack. _God damn it._

_“Hyunggggggg~”_

_Fuck, he’s relentless._ Youngmin sighed, turning around to face the aegyo-exuding male on the ground. He grasped the outstretched hand and easily pulled the younger into a sitting position.

Donghyun smirked. But before he could boast about his “undeniably amazing power” over his hyung, Youngmin leaned forward and brought his free hand to the back of Donghyun’s neck, pulling him closer. Tilting his head ever so slightly, he pressed his lips to Donghyun’s, planting a sweet and slow kiss that left a delicious, lingering warmth once he pulled away.

Donghyun couldn’t help but gasp at the surprise attack and now it was Youngmin’s turn to smirk. “Come on, Donghyunie,” he chirped and ruffled the other’s hair, as if he didn’t just turn Donghyun into a blushing disaster. “Time for practice.”

And with a laugh that brightly concealed any devious intent, Youngmin strutted away to the dance studio with a wide-eyed Donghyun frozen in his seat.

It was only minutes later when Donghyun had finished processing what had happened that he realized his phone was nowhere to be found.

“Damn it, hyung!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 12.25.17 over in Korea, so MERRY YOUNGMIN DAY ~ Happy birthday to our lovable alpaca leader!
> 
> Also y'all should check out the Xmas dance practice they did on VLive - it's adorable af. Honestly watch all their VLives - you won't regret it, I promise. 
> 
> Have a safe and happy holidays, everyone!


	2. sending my love through snapchat

**University AU / Fluff / 723 words.**

*******

Youngmin entered the classroom in a fiery rage and stomped to his seat in the second to last row. Dr. Park hadn’t arrived yet, which was normal given that Youngmin always came seven minutes early, but today his professor’s absence seemed to grind Youngmin’s gears.

He threw his backpack to the ground and huffed in his seat. _Screw Dr. Park. I shouldn’t have to be here right now. I should be studying, damn it._

He didn’t _really_ need these attendance points, did he? He quickly scanned through the options in his head.

_I could leave now and do some last-minute studying in the library, or sit here for 45 minutes without paying attention because fuck this class._

He was about to leave when he heard the door open. With five minutes to spare, Dr. Park entered the classroom and Youngmin didn’t hesitate to glare at the professor’s back as he made his way to the podium.

“Well, too fucking late now,” he muttered bitterly.

Needless to say, Youngmin was stressed. This exam could make or break his future.

…Alright, that may have been an exaggeration, but he desperately needed to do well on this exam to get accepted into graduate school, and instead of using the extra hour to study, he was forced to spend it in this class he really didn’t give two shits about.

 

 

_Two weeks ago:_

_Youngmin sat back in his seat and quickly read through the email he had oh-so-formally typed to Professor Park._

>  “Professor, I wanted to tell you in advance that I’ll be taking my graduate school examination on the 12th of October (Thursday). The proctors want us present half an hour in advance of the examination, so I may have to miss class that day. I apologize for any inconvenience.
> 
> Best regards,
> 
> Lim Youngmin.”

_Short, to the point, and just a tad bit fake. The perfectly crafted email to a professor._

_Satisfied, Youngmin hit the “Send” button._

_A few hours later, Youngmin received the following reply:_

> “Hi Youngmin,
> 
> Thank you for telling me. Please come to class for your attendance points and you can leave early.
> 
> Thanks.
> 
> Sent from iPhone 6.”

 

Youngmin had been in a moodTM ever since.

The lecture started and Youngmin didn’t even bother to pay attention. Whatever Professor Park was saying was pushed to the back of Youngmin’s frantic thoughts as he tried to recall everything he had studied over the past two months. His notebook was soon littered with columns of synonyms – vocabulary was Youngmin’s weakness – and nonsensical doodles.

 At the halfway mark, Youngmin deemed it was appropriate to leave. He quickly shuffled his things together and threw a subtle wave at Dr. Park (who was turned around to write something on the board) before sprinting out of the lecture hall.

Of course, the cherry on top was that his exam was held in a building halfway across campus. _I hate my life,_ he thought as he power-walked.

Youngmin was busy mumbling more synonyms under his breath when he felt his phone buzz.

It was a Snapchat from Donghyun.

If it had been anyone else, he would’ve ignored it.

Youngmin’s not biased.

Much.

When he opened it, Donghyun’s “candid” face appeared with the caption:

“ **GOOD LUCK HYUNG. FIGHTING.** ”

Which was followed by:

“ **Hyung, I know you’ll do great given how much you studied. And no matter what happens, just know that there are people who love you.** ”

Youngmin couldn’t help but blush at the younger’s sweet message. He quickly sent a blurry selfie – he was power-walking, okay? – with a brief caption:

“ **Ah, my cute dongsaeng. I have too much to say right now, so I’ll just say thank you, and I love you.** ”

*******

_One month later…_

Youngmin passed with “competitive scores”. _I did it,_ he sighed in relief.

The first person he told was Donghyun. “I DID IT”, he exclaimed in a Snapchat video of him alpaca-dancing in happiness.

Donghyun laughed and sent an equally ecstatic video of him yelling, “AHH CONGRATS” before spreading the good news to Woojin and Daehwi. It was official. Celebration was in order and the three of them would have to find a congratulatory gift of sorts for their precious hyung.

“ **Of course you did well, hyung.** ” Donghyun messaged later. “ **You had the power of my love and affection, and that _never_ goes wrong. ^~^** ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \-- Sent from iPhone 6. (Why do professors do this. I mean, after I've spent so much time trying to be fake-nice?????)
> 
> If any of you are taking the GRE, good luck! It's not that bad if you study and do practice tests - it's just long (4+ hours), but hey, MCAT is like 7+ hours so. Just hope your professor doesn't make you show up to class like mine did. /still annoyed/


	3. [M] holding onto your cold hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be mindful of the rating of this chapter. This is my first time writing smut of any kind, so...yeah. There's not really any specific AU here - just know it's not canon.

**[M] Angst / 1,017 words.**

***

With a final grunt, Youngmin thrust into the younger man one last time before he pulled out, ripping off the condom in one brisk motion, a testament to his experience (and need for release).

“Kiss me,” the younger man said, breathily, and Youngmin complied as he pumped his length with increasing speed. His impatience seared through the kiss, their tongues fighting filthily for dominance. Youngmin hovered over the other, a hand firmly pressed against Donghyun’s neck as they kissed, his own legs nearly giving way with strain. Their fingers brushed each other as they raced for release, their wanton gasps warming the air around them into a hazy bubble.

Donghyun came first, his body shuddering under the weight of the elder as streams of white splattered across his lower abdomen. His mouth fell slack and Youngmin dove in once more to kiss him fiercely, his moans amplifying with his heightening release.

He came seconds later, his length pulsing in waves as the sticky substance splayed repeatedly against Donghyun’s torso. His legs buckled, and Youngmin collapsed over the other, their mouths melding against each other in another series of open-mouthed kisses.

Youngmin pulled away first, his eyes closed as he pressed their foreheads together. The pair lay there, gasping, in the moment not bothering to care about the wet (and quite frankly gross) remnants of their passionate endeavors.

As the two came down from their high, Youngmin rolled off and lay on his back. Everything felt too hot. He languidly reached for some tissues, groaning when he had to stretch rather painfully to get them; he handed a few over to Donghyun. He quickly cleaned up and tossed the rolled up ball of tissues onto the carpet; he’d deal with it later.

Donghyun rolled over on his side to face the elder, his cheeks flushed in the afterglow. His lips curved into a lazy smile as he stared at Youngmin’s impassive countenance.

The elder’s eyes remained closed as he breathed heavily, and Donghyun held back a lighthearted jab regarding Youngmin’s increasing age and decreasing stamina.

“I love you, hyung.”

Youngmin’s eyes shot open at that.

He paused.

“Hm?”

He didn’t mishear, right?

Donghyun chuckled, and Youngmin felt his chest tighten. _Please, don’t._

“I said,” Donghyun shifted closer, and Youngmin fought the urge to scoot back. “I love you, hyung,” Donghyun repeated, and Youngmin wanted to _scream_ at how innocent he sounded, how _naïve_ he sounded.

_Fuck._

He felt trapped.

_Why me?_

What could he say? This wasn’t supposed to happen.

_Fuck._

So he setteld with, “Oh.”

He inwardly seethed. The moment his mouth opened, he knew that that wasn’t the right response. He shut his eyes again, not daring to meet the younger’s gaze for fear of what he would see there.

Had he kept his eyes open, he would have seen Donghyun’s face falter a little, his eyes droop a little, his lips failing to hold up his default sunshine smile.

“Do you…” Donghyun started, and Youngmin wanted to cry. “Do you love me too?”

Youngmin felt suffocated. He wanted to scream. _Why?_ This isn’t what he wanted. _Why did Donghyun have to go and—_ He knew that his fight-or-flight response was about to engage.

He knew what he would choose.

_I’m sorry, Donghyun._

Youngmin sat up abruptly, picking up his clothes which were scattered across the floor of Donghyun’s room. Donghyun looked up with wide eyes, sitting up to follow Youngmin’s movements.

“Hyung?”

“Please stop talking, Donghyun-ah,” Youngmin said as he got dressed, his voice stern, but void of malice. _I’m doing this to help you,_ he wanted to say. He didn’t want this to hurt anymore than it already did.

“Hyung, wait,” Donghyun started, and Youngmin couldn’t bear to hear the pleading in his voice. “Are you leaving?”

He hated it.

He hated it because it made him feel even worse.

_This wasn’t supposed to happen!_

“I don’t think we should do this anymore, Hyun-ah.”

Donghyun stood there, his eyes widened with shock. “W-…” He cleared his throat. _Damn it, was he going to cry?_ “Hyung, what are you saying?”

“We agreed,” he said. Youngmin sighed, heavy and tired. “We said we wouldn’t let it come to this.”

He still couldn’t face him.

“No falling in love, remember?” He said, his words soft, but deafening.  

And if Youngmin turned around, he would have seen Donghyun look towards the ground, his eyes starting to brim with tears, his lip trembling as he started to hear his heart breaking.

_The guilt would be worse if I looked at you._

Youngmin headed towards the door.

_I don’t want to be a monster._

He quickly shoved his feet into his shoes, laces tangled and dangling.

_Please don’t turn me into a monster._

“Hyung, please listen to me.”

Youngmin reached for the door handle.

“Hyung…”

Youngmin clenched his eyes shut. He hated this. He hated this so much. _When did you change? Why did this happen?_

“Hyung!”

And Youngmin turned to face him, risking a final look to assess the damage he did.

Donghyun was crying. His sobs tore through the walls and echoed in his ears. He decides that having Donghyun’s tear-streaked face imprinted in his memory was decent punishment for his sins.   

_It wasn’t supposed to be like this._

“I’m sorry, Donghyun,” Youngmin said, masking his voice with apathy. “I didn’t want to hurt you like this.”

_I didn’t want you to fall in love with me._

“You’re hurting me more by leaving!”

Youngmin steeled his expression once more, turning the handle to open the door.

“Hyung!”

“No, Donghyun.”

He opened the door and headed out into the hallway.

_Please understand._

“It would hurt more if you kept loving me.”

_I’m sorry._

“Wait—”

_Truly, I am._

“Goodbye, Donghyun.”

The click of the door accompanied by Donghyun’s cries resonated within his chest. His footsteps were heavy as he walked down the hallway. His fists clenched. He hoped Donghyun wouldn’t follow.

_I’m doing this for you._

He broke into a run.

_You don’t have to forgive me._

He needed to get away.

_You don’t deserve a monster like me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for making Youngmin the bad guy here. This was my first time writing something with these themes, so I'm quite pleased with this development.
> 
> Also, check out MXM's "Gone Cold" (식어버린 온도) (the title is from that song) if you haven't already! (And who else is excited for MXM & Sewoon & Gwanghyun's release?) :D


	4. roommates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Try to guess the secret behind Donghyun's dorm room number.

**University AU / 878 words.**

*******

“Here’s your key, and welcome to BNM University!”

“Thank you.”

Donghyun tucked the key into his back pocket and took one of the folded maps of campus from the front desk.

“Hi, how may I help you?”

The voices of incoming freshmen trailed behind him as he headed towards the elevator, one of many suitcases in tow. He was thankful to be placed in the Honors program (all by his own merit, thank you very much) and was thus placed in the Honors dormitories, which had many more perks compared to the “normal” dormitories, like air conditioning, elevators, and most importantly, single rooms.

His friend, Donghan, was unfortunately placed in those “normal” dormitories and he could already picture the next few days being bombarded with complaints like, “It’s too freaking hot at night, I’m going to die.”

Donghyun felt bad, but he also felt exceptionally lucky to be placed in a single room. He never liked the idea of having a roommate – not even if said roommate was Donghan, and both friends acknowledged that they liked their own space. As he went up to his assigned room on the fourth floor, he was already imagining how he would set up his stuff and decorate the walls.

_408…410…412…_

Finally, he reached his assigned room: 414.

_Welcome to your new home away from home, Kim Donghyun._

***

Later that evening, after hours of unpacking and meeting up with fellow floormates, Donghyun came into his new home, exhausted and spent after a long day. It was Friday night, and any normal college student would be out partying before the start of the semester, enjoying their last bits of freedom before the sixteen weeks of hell began.

The idea was tempting, but Donghyun could use some shut eye. He would party tomorrow. That’s what weekends were for, right?

He began his trek to the bathroom to get ready for bed. _Look, Mom, I’m going to bed before 11:00 for once._

“Shouldn’t you be out partying?”

And Donghyun had never felt his chest drop so hard and so fast before.

He whipped around, eyes widening in fear as he saw a translucent figure of a boy who didn’t look that much older than him.

He pinched himself.

And then he slapped himself.

“Jesus, what are you doing? Don’t hurt yourself. It was just a question!”

Donghyun let out a scream as the boy spoke, a flurry of questions whizzing in his head.

“Ugh, they do this _every_ year,” the ghost boy muttered. He was about to step forward and offer a disarming smile, but he remembered that the tenants tended to get even more freaked out so he stepped back instead.

“First of all, relax, I can’t hurt you,” the ghost said, keeping his voice neutral. When it looked like the human wouldn’t have a panic attack, he continued. “My name is Youngmin, and yes, I’m the ghost that haunts this room.”

At the moment, the human looked utterly pale, all color drained from his face as his mouth hung open in shock. The ghost sighed. “And what’s your name?”

“Uh, I’m D-Donghyun.”

“Oh hey, I know like three other Donghyuns,” Youngmin sent a smile this time, and he was relieved to see Donghyun relax a bit.

“Who are you?” Donghyun asked, the tremor still in his voice, but he willed his heart to stop beating so damn fast.

“Uh, well, if you’re asking me who I _was_ ,” Youngmin said. “I was a student here, just like you. I died when a tornado picked up my car and flung it across campus. I died instantly.”

Youngmin had told his story too many times to feel bitter, so he gave the condensed version, as dramatic as it all was. To be frank, he barely remembered what happened anymore because it didn’t matter.

“So why are you here?”

Youngmin sighed. This question came up not as often, but still enough for him to be tired of it.

“Like most ghosts, we’re stuck because we have unfinished business,” Youngmin replied, the answer dry and stale from repetition. “But I don’t _know_ what my business is so until someone helps me, I will stay here.”

Despite how sad it sounded, Youngmin had given up hope a while ago and was beginning to resign himself to a fate of forever haunting this lame university dorm room until … well, he didn’t know.

“So…” Donghyun pondered, fear slowly being replaced with intrigue. “There were others who could see you then. The other kids who stayed in this room.”

Youngmin nodded, but then hesitated. “Well, some of them.” Youngmin shook his head and gave another grin. “In any case, why aren’t you partying? That’s what kids like you do on Friday nights.”

Donghyun stood up and made his way to the bathroom, not even bothering to close the door. “I was tired and was about to go to bed.”

“Lame.”

Donghyun frowned. “So you’re stuck here,” and Youngmin nodded. Donghyun groaned, which Youngmin took a teeny amount of offense at. “Guess I’ll end up having a roommate after all.”

“At least the walls are soundproof,” Youngmin said. “You can talk to me all you want and no one will think you’re any crazier than you already are.”

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tornado thing actually happened to two girls who went to my uni.


	5. blessing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to be clear, this isn't JBJ/Hotshot's Noh Taehyun. For those of you who don't know, Donghyun has a twin named Taehyun!

**Fantasy/Magic (?) AU / Angst / Minor Character Death / 1579 words.**

*******

A burst of smoke jolted Youngmin out of his daydreaming session and he immediately groaned upon realizing who had just clumsily teleported into his room.

“Hi hyung!” The chipper voice pulled Youngmin farther and farther from his delightful dreams of running through meadows with … a special (fucking oblivious) someone, and closer to his spiritual duties.

“Hi Woojin,” Youngmin grumbled, turning to face the younger to assess his landing. “Hey, look, you didn’t break any of my things this time. You’re actually getting better at the whole teleportation thing.”

“I know, right?” Woojin exclaimed with glee. “It’s so convenient, and soon I won’t have to take public transport anymore!”

“Right,” Youngmin dismissed the overwhelming amount of excitement pouring out of the younger messenger. “So what brings you here today?”

“Oh,” Woojin pulled out a scroll from the bag hanging off his shoulder. “This is for you. It needs to be done by midnight.”

Youngmin looked at the clock. It was just past 6:00 in the evening. _Not horrendously late_ , he thought. _Could’ve been much more punctual though, for sure._

“Any reason why you’re giving this to me _now_?” Youngmin grumbled, mostly for the sake of complaining about something. “And Jesus, why is everything set to midnight?”

“I have no idea,” Woojin said, completely unfazed. “I’m just the messenger. I’ll let BoA-noona know you’re handling this.” He closed his bag and smiled his signature snaggletooth grin. “See you later, hyung!” And with another burst of smoke – _poof!_ – he was gone, and Youngmin was left alone in his room again.

He opened the scroll, staring at the name written in large black letters at the top. He felt his heart still.

**_Kim Taehyun._ **

“Oh, no…” Youngmin gripped the edges of the scroll tighter, the paper crinkling underneath his fingers. “Donghyunnie…”

He had seen Donghyun earlier. They had gone out for lunch and returned to Youngmin’s place to watch a movie. Youngmin had foolishly hoped the chill atmosphere would lead to more intimate endeavors, but of course, Donghyun was none the wiser and remained painstakingly unaware of Youngmin’s feelings. He had gone back to his dorm not even an hour ago.

So there was a very good chance he didn’t know.

Youngmin’s heart pounded against his chest. Why him? Why Taehyun? What the hell happened?

He quickly got dressed – not that it really mattered where he was going – and gathered up his things. Every action had a hint of urgency, especially this time when it affected someone he cared about deeply.

Donghyun would be devastated.

Youngmin could only hope that everything would soon come to light. He sent a silent prayer for a safe return, and a successful mission, before chanting the spell he had memorized by heart, and quickly teleported to the realm of the dead.

***

As the smoke cleared, he was in a familiar-looking cave. The slate gray walls of the cave were studded with millions of lightning blue crystals, each one glistening on their own. It was a beautiful location despite the eeriness, but, Youngmin figured, new ghosts would have a visually appealing journey to the next realm.

After a moment, a silhouette appeared before him, and Youngmin’s voice caught in his throat. It was only then that the reality of what happened came crashing down on him, and _holy shit, this was not a dream._

“Taehyun,” Youngmin whispered. He was usually more composed during missions, but this no doubt affected him more because he had known Taehyun personally.  

“Taehyun-ah, what happened?” Youngmin asked, trying to keep his voice steady. “Why are you here?”

Taehyun had a sad smile. “Car accident,” he said. “The medics brought me to the hospital but…yeah.” He sighed. “They did what they could, hyung,” he continued, “Even if I lived, I would’ve been a vegetable for the rest of my life.” Another sigh, another wistful smile.

“I think this was for the best.”

Youngmin only stared, speechless. Taehyun’s life was cut so short. Just like that. Another life snuffed out. He could barely wrap his head around how Taehyun was handling this much better than he had anticipated.

_Like he was already used to being dead._

“I’m sorry, hyung,” Taehyun said, remorseful. “I’m even more sorry for Donghyunie…”

Youngmin could only nod. The twins were close, closer than any two people he had ever seen.  

In the distance, he heard the sound of bells and chimes, the sound of another spirit passing over, and a harsh reminder that he was here for a reason.

He took a deep breath. “Taehyun-ah,” his voice wobbled, “You know why I’m here.”

Taehyun pressed his lips together, grim. “I do.”

“You have something you want to tell me. Only then can you safely move on,” Youngmin gritted out the words he was so accustomed to saying out of formality, but today they tasted bitter on his tongue. His chest pulsed painfully, alternating between sharp pangs and hollow emptiness. He felt like he was going to pass out. “Speak now, or forever hold your peace.”

Taehyun closed his eyes, putting together the proper words. Youngmin lowered his head, staring at a spot on the cave floor, unable to meet the younger’s eyes.

“I want my brother to be happy.”

Youngmin nodded, a silent cue for the other to continue.

“He has feelings for you, you know,” Taehyun continued. “I always thought you were oblivious,” he said with a sad chuckle. “Maybe it’s a brother thing, but I never thought he could hide it that well.”

Youngmin’s eyes shot open, flicking upward to meet the new spirit’s eyes. _Donghyun…what?_

 “He’ll be happy with you,” Taehyun said, hopeful. “We’ve spoken a lot about you, and I’ve noticed how much happier he is with you, and how much happier you are with him. It annoyed me so much that you two couldn’t notice it for yourselves.”

Youngmin’s mouth hung open, the shock replacing the pain of losing one of his best friends.

“I want you to always be by his side,” Taehyun said, and Youngmin began to hear the first few faint chimes coming from the cave walls around him. “Promise me that you’ll always be there for him. I will be happy knowing that my brother is in good hands.”

Youngmin nodded, tears springing to his eyes. “I will.”

“I know you two love each other,” Taehyun said, his voice starting to shake with emotion. “I can see it in your eyes. I wish I could’ve experienced that for myself before it was too late.”

“Taehyun-ah…” Youngmin lamented. This was by far the hardest mission he had been given, but deep down he was thankful that he was the one to do it. _Why did it have to be this way?_ “I’m so sorry.”

He began to sob as tears trickled from his eyes. “I’m so, so sorry…”

Taehyun chuckled. “You have nothing to apologize for, hyung,” he said. “But if you hurt my brother, I won’t forgive you,” he added, trying to insert a little bit of humor to this inopportune moment.

“I know it’s still a long way away,” Taehyun said, and more chimes sounded, growing in number. “But just know. Whenever you decide to pop the question, I give you my blessing. And please don’t stress too much. He’ll say yes. He’ll just be waiting for you to ask him first.”

“All I ask is that you make sure my brother is never alone, as long as he lives. Can you make sure of that?”

Youngmin nodded, the tears coming down now in rivers across his cheeks. “Yes,” he said. “I can.”

He forced down the emotions building in his throat. “I will.”

Taehyun sent a smile. “Then it is time. Donghyun will no doubt ask you everything. Be ready for that.”

“I know,” Youngmin said, wiping his tears. “He will be heartbroken,” he choked out.

“All wounds take time to heal. But they will heal faster if you’re there for him,” Taehyun said, before turning around to face the darkened end of the tunnel. “It is time for me to go.”

Youngmin leaped forward, grabbing onto Taehyun’s form, and pulled him into a soul-crushing hug, sobbing. “Taehyun-ah. I’ll miss you. So much.”

Taehyun brought his arms around the just-barely-taller man’s form, returning the warmth he was given.  “I’m sorry, hyung.” The chimes were louder now, surrounding the pair in a resonant bubble. “Tell Donghyunie I love him. Tell our parents too. And our friends.”

“I will,” Youngmin nodded against the other’s neck. His lips hurt, clenched between his teeth as he stifled his cries. “I promise.”

“Don’t be too sad,” Taehyun said. “We’ll meet again, I’m sure of it,” and he gently released his hold around Youngmin’s torso.

And with a final smile, Taehyun grinned as brightly as he could, “See you later?”

Youngmin held on for just a little longer, nodding fiercely before letting Taehyun go, his vision blurring as he watched Taehyun walk down the cave floor.

Taehyun turned towards the dark end of the tunnel, walking towards the portal that no spirit would ever return from. The chimes faded with each step he took, taking a piece of Youngmin’s heart forever into the next world. _We’ll meet again. I’m sorry, Taehyun. Goodbye._

Youngmin clenched his fists, seeing the spirit fade into nothing, wishing him a safe send-off before saying, in a choked up voice, “I now release you from this world. May you find refuge in the next world.”

_We’ll miss you, Taehyun-ah._


	6. mr. taxi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KCON NY tickets go on sale tomorrow and I am scared.

**Slice-of-Life AU / Fluff / 383 words.**

*******

****“Hyung.”

“Hm,” Youngmin hummed, continuing to type his cover letter for a job application. _Does_ no one _hire millenials anymore?_

“How much do you love me?”

The elder froze, momentarily shocked. He had made a series of typos and aggressively attacked the backspace key.

He swallowed. “Why?”

“…’kay, well,” Donghyun started, all of a sudden nervous. “You know how I’m going to that concert next week? The one in Masan?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I, uhh…” The younger was rambling now. “I’m gonna be home super late and I’m gonna need a ride.”

Youngmin raised his eyebrows in question. “From…?”

“N-not from Masan, oh my God, no, can you imagine? That’d be a nightmare.” The younger laughed, another sign he was nervous as hell. “No, I need a ride from the train station over in Bucheon. It’s the only one that comes back that late…”

Youngmin went back to his cover letter. _God, I sound hella fake._ “What time?”

“Uh…” Donghyun fiddled with the blanket under him and cleared his throat. “3:00.”

Youngmin’s eyes widened. “In the morning? Jesus…”

“It’s fine if you can’t,” Donghyun said with a twinge of disappointment. “I know it’s a Sunday night and everything. Really weird choice on their part,” he trailed off on a tangent, another habit of his when anxiety took over. “Like in the past, the concerts were Friday and Saturday and now it’s Saturday and Sunday. Why would they do that? Like what if you have school and shit?”

Youngmin laced his fingers together, bending his hands to crunch his joints. With any luck, he’d finish this cover letter in the next half hour.

Donghyun mumbled, “I could always call a taxi. Do taxis run at that hour? Or,” he joked. “I could just sleep at the train station. Become a hobo for a day?”

Youngmin sighed. “I’ll pick you up,” he said and Donghyun’s face immediately lit up with surprise and gratitude. _Ugh, I’m gonna hate myself later._ “I don’t want you getting robbed.”

“Aw, hyung!” Donghyun bounced forward to hug the elder, who groaned at the sudden weight pressing against his side. “You _do_ love me!”

Youngmin shoved the younger off, a smirk playing on his lips. “Yeah, yeah,” he muttered and ruffled the other’s hair. “Now leave me alone. I need a job.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell that I'm both of them? 
> 
> I know it's short - I literally thought about this when I was going to the orthodontist earlier. I have a longer one prepared but it got too long, so I'm deciding what to do about it.
> 
> ***
> 
> Talk to me here! | https://ask.fm/taesquared


	7. limited edition dreams [excerpt]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a snippet from my newest on-going story! It's called "you flicker before me", so please go check it out!

**Canon-Compliant / Magical Realism / 1305 words.**

***

YDPP was set to have a live performance – Gwanghyun was practically bouncing off the walls – and so the four members were in the middle of dance practice. Youngmin, being the eldest, paused the music every so often to fix one of the other member’s movements, leaving no angle unchecked, and was meticulous as ever.

It was during one of the full playthroughs that it happened. One moment, Donghyun was dancing along happily to the music, getting ready to switch blocking for his verse. The next moment, there was a flash, and he had somehow ended up in the backseat of a moving van.

His first instinct was to panic. This was _no_ time for a kidnapping. 

He immediately looked around and was about to scream for help when he saw Woojin and his bandmate Jihoon chatting comfortably in the seats in front of him.

“I heard we’ll be meeting Mina and Yoojung today,” Woojin said. “Our IOI sunbaenims,” he cheered, happy to meet the legendary girls who started it all.

“Honestly, I’m just happy to have a schedule again,” Jihoon said, staring out the window. “Apart from music shows, we never went anywhere. The drought is finally ending.”

“I feel bad for the maknaes, though,” Woojin muttered, and Donghyun agreed, still trying to get used to what was happening. _Sungwoon-hyung, too_ , he thought.

“Sungwoon-hyung, too,” Woojin echoed, and Donghyun did a double take. _Did I say that out loud?_

Careful not to startle the pink sausages, Donghyun softly spoke up, “Woojin-ah.”

“Sungwoon-hyung needs to get out more, his nagging is getting to be too much,” Jihoon joked.

“True that,” Woojin replied with a wide smile.

Louder this time, Donghyun called out. “Woojin-ah!”

 _“I first saw you on a day where the cherry blossoms were falling…”_ Jihoon started to sing, and Woojin followed, his voice a bit scratchy from not having warmed up.

 _Still nothing?_ Donghyun even sang along to Jaehwan’s part – as both pink sausages decided to give up at that part – and yet it was as if he was – _déjà vu?_ – invisible at the back of the van.

The first time, he was willing to treat it as an accident. _But…wasn’t it a dream?_

The second time – _did I fall asleep and just not know?_ – not so much.

Something weird was happening, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it. _This_ wasn’t a dream.

But maybe it was a really trippy hallucination.

 _But I haven’t taken anything!_ the poor boy thought frantically.

Just as the van came to the filming location, the two boys in front bustled with excitement, and Donghyun started to feel lightheaded. A familiar buzzing started in his ear. A whooshing sound came out of nowhere, soft at first, but quickly crescendoed into a deafening boom, as if there was a plane flying overhead. His vision blurred, and he brought his hands to cover his eyes, shutting them tightly.

When he came to, he was back in the practice room, laying on the ground and looking up at three very concerned – an understatement – faces.

His head started to pulse in pain and he sat up (which worsened the pain). He clenched his eyes shut and groaned. “What happened?”

When his vision cleared, he noticed. Poor Gwanghyun looked like he was about to cry. Sewoon was mostly impassive, but his lips pressed together firmly with worry. Youngmin’s eyes flashed with anger, and he yanked Donghyun’s arm forward.

“We were about to call the ambulance, you _bastard_ ,” he snarled, letting go of the younger’s arm forcefully. “Don’t _ever_ do that again. I fucking told you to take care of yourself and you didn’t listen. You never listen! Look at Gwanghyun, he’s about to have a stroke because of you!”

Donghyun looked around and saw a few staff members worriedly looking over the scene, whispering among themselves, with some awkwardly not knowing what to do. His manager had even entered, a grave expression on his face, phone in hand, probably seconds away from calling for help before Donghyun came to.

He gave a slight bow to the staff before he turned towards the Starship trainee, whose lip was now trembling after Youngmin’s outburst. Donghyun placed a comforting hand on his friend’s upper arm. “Gwanghyunie, I’m okay,” he tried to smile. “I’m sorry for worrying you,” he said. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Gwanghyun nodded with a sniffle, moving closer to Donghyun to give him a hug. When they pulled back, the Starship trainee asked, “Are you okay? Do you need to go to the hospital?”

Donghyun shook his head. “I think I’ll be fine. I just have a headache, that’s all,” he said. He knew it sounded flippant, but he was mostly telling the truth. He barely knew what was going on himself.

Youngmin stood up abruptly, a scowl etched on his face. He turned towards the other members and addressed the staff in the room, “I think we should rest for today. Donghyun is in no condition to continue practicing. We can get up early tomorrow to practice before the recording.”

He bowed to the staff and took one last look at Donghyun before swiping up his things from the floor and exiting the practice room. He closed the door forcefully, and the three younger members flinched at the noise.

The staff also began to exit, some of whom came over to Donghyun to ask if he was alright. Donghyun merely nodded and flashed one of his bright smiles, hoping it would help everyone worry less.

Once the staff left, the three remaining members huddled closer, moving towards the mirror.

“Donghyun-ah, are you really okay?” Sewoon asked, moving to Donghyun’s other side. “Don’t worry about Youngmin-hyung, he was just really worried. He was like two seconds away from a panic attack,” he added.

Donghyun smiled. “My head just hurts a little,” he replied. “I’ll be okay.”

Sewoon paused before asking, hesitantly, “Has this happened before?”

Donghyun shook his head. “No. Not like that,” he said, deciding to confide in his members. “I mean, I did wake up late the other day, which I _never do_ , and Youngmin-hyung had to wake me up.” He paused, trying to remember. “It was weird though.”

When the others didn’t respond, he continued, hesitantly.

“It was like…” he started. “It was like I was trapped in my dreams. And just now, it felt the same way.”

“You were dreaming?” Gwanghyun asked.

Donghyun nodded. “I saw Woojin and Jihoon. I think they were heading to film something.”

“It didn’t _look_ like you were dreaming,” Sewoon replied. “You were too still. If you were dreaming, your eyes would’ve been twitching, but they weren’t.” He fiddled with his fingers. “It was like you fainted, but…deeper.” His voice fell, “You weren’t even breathing. We couldn’t feel your pulse, Donghyun-ah. We really thought we were about to lose you.”

Donghyun felt like an utter jerk now. He didn’t intend for any of this to happen. Now Youngmin was mad at him, and the Starship trainees were incessantly worrying about him.

“Guys, it’s okay!” Donghyun said, trying to smile the anxiety away. “I’m fine! Look,” he stood up and twirled, “See?”

The two YDPP members merely tilted their heads, unimpressed. Donghyun sighed. “Look, if it happens again, I promise I’ll go to the hospital. But until then, we can just say I was too tired, and I passed out for a bit. Okay?”

Sewoon sighed. Gwanghyun mumbled an, “Okay,” emotionally drained from seeing his friend collapse. They didn’t bring it up again, nor were they in the mood to continue dancing, so Sewoon simply stood up and said, “Let’s go find our leader. I sincerely hope he isn’t punching a wall right now.” He chuckled, humorlessly, “He would break his knuckles and then we’d _really_ have to go to the hospital.”


	8. goodbye days (hello nights)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was something I wrote a long time ago for another fandom and never finished, so here's me recycling it so it can see the light of day (ha). It's based on the Japanese movie, "Taiyou no Uta", which is about a girl who has a rare skin condition (Xeroderma Pigmentosum or XP) that makes it impossible for her to be exposed to sunlight. 
> 
> Every night, she goes out busking because she dreams of becoming a singer. One night, she catches sight of a boy who - surprise surprise - becomes her love interest, and asks her best friend to gather more info about the boy at school (since she obviously cannot go). This is the scene that follows, ft. our lovely Dongpaca. 
> 
> I highly recommend this movie and the songs have stayed with me since I heard them the first time.
> 
> ALSO. Thank you to all of you who have left such sweet and adorable comments. I read them all, I promise! Even if I don't reply to them, I'm always touched when I get the emails. Thank you all!

**Taiyou no Uta AU / Angst (?) / 638 words.**

*******

“What the hell is this?” Youngmin growled. “This is…me!”

Donghyun flinched. “Look, it isn’t what it looks li-”

Youngmin looked ready to pop a vein. “Really? Because this looks like footage of me sleeping in class. What else do we have here,” he glared, going through the files in the camera. “Ah, it looks like me getting bitched at by Professor Hwang…fucking old geezer.” Donghyun cowered. “You filmed me _eating_ too? What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay, but if you could ju-”

“Did Woojin do this?”

“What?”

“I said, did Woojin film this? Who else do you have working for you?”

“They’re not working for me, what the hell—”

 “So there _is_ more than one-“

“They’re not _working_ for me, oh my God, Donghan and Woojin are just friends!”

“Ah, so friends go around stalking strangers for each other, is that it?”

“No!”

The older angrily chucked the camera to the pavement. Donghyun winced from the impact (Donghan was going to be pissed). “Don’t do this again,” Youngmin threatened darkly, “If I catch you or your friends filming me again, I’ll kill you all myself.” Youngmin grumbled as he put on his helmet and stomped back to his moped.

Donghyun scrambled to pick up the camera, looking it over for dents, as Youngmin started up the engine. The spluttering of the motor sounded angrily and Donghyun hurriedly threw the camera into his bag before scampering up to the moped as Youngmin started to drive away.

“Wait!” Donghyun shouted, starting to run after Youngmin. “I’m Donghyun! Kim Donghyun!”

But Youngmin was gone, the moped’s taillights fading rapidly into the night, the grating motor dying out into the distance. The red dot continued to get smaller and smaller until it wasn’t there anymore, leaving Donghyun alone once again.

“…I wanted to show you something,” Donghyun whispered into the darkness. He sighed with defeat. How was he ever going to confess now? He could just imagine Woojin laughing at him and teasing him for _ever_ about this. ( _“That’s a new level of playing hard-to-get!”_ )

Dejected, he turned around to trek home when a bright orange something caught his eye, lying next to the sewage drain, its form too large to slip down into the depths below.

_Youngmin’s basketball…_

Donghyun quickly gathered the ball under his arm, struggling to keep his balance with his guitar in his other hand. He gazed around at the mostly-empty street, finding a small lamp-lit clearing near the cop station. He whipped out his phone.

 _11:57 p.m._ More than enough time for another busking session.

He checked to ensure his alarm was set for when he needed to get back home before the sunrise before making his way over to the curb. He kneeled down over his guitar case, lit a match, and set his candle aglow. He sent a quick prayer before taking his guitar out, resting Youngmin’s basketball to sit comfortably inside the case and chuckled. In a way, it was like a piece of Youngmin was with him tonight, and Donghyun smiled at the thought.

He took a breath, and started to play.

> _So I'll go to you now, I've made up my mind_  
>  _I want to play you the song in my pocket_  
>  _I quietly turned up the volume to make sure_

As he strummed, his voice, although a bit raspy at first from screaming, began to grow more confident. His pure tone rang through the streets, accompanied by the gentle tune of the guitar. He sang of longing, of wishing for something more.

> _Oh good-bye days_  
>  I feel like things are changing now  
>  So long yesterday and before  
>  I have a clumsy tenderness by my side  
>  La la la la la ~ with you… 

And maybe, just _maybe_ he thought of a tall, dark-haired boy tonight.


	9. a visitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- Wow it's been a while. I suck, I'm sorry.
> 
> \- Sehwan is Rhymer’s Korean name.
> 
> \- The italics are when the characters are speaking in English (you’ll understand as you read). 
> 
> \- This is loosely based off of when I was in Busan.

**AU / Realistic Fiction / 2232 words.**

*******

“Donghyun.”

Donghyun looked up, mid-chew. He hummed, but kept an eye on the mouthwatering pieces of pork laying delectably on the plate in front of him.

“I have some work I have to finish, back at the office,” Sehwan said. Donghyun picked up on a slight hint of hesitation in his voice. “It’s a fairly urgent project and my coworkers are waiting for me. Do you mind watching over Daehwi for a few hours? I would normally take him along but…”

Donghyun swallowed and said (while covering his mouth), “Oh, sure! I don’t mind at all!”

Sehwan felt his shoulders drop with gratitude. “Really?”

“Yeah, I’ll look over him. It’ll be like babysitting.” Donghyun paused. “Which I love.” He meant it, even if it came out sounding sarcastic.

“Oh my God, thank you, thank you so much!” Sehwan grinned giddily and quickly scurried into his room to grab his bag and project materials. When he reemerged into the living room a few minutes later, he asked worriedly, “Are you really sure it’s okay? I don’t want to interrupt any of your plans.”

Donghyun nodded vigorously, waving his chopsticks towards the door. “I didn’t have any plans today, don’t worry! Daehwi seems to like me just fine, hyung, and he’s so adorable,” he cooed, gazing fondly at the six-year-old sitting across from him. “I’m sure I can entertain him for a few hours. Go have fun.”

Sehwan chuckled, “I _wish_ I was having fun. Really, I owe you one.”

Donghyun disregarded the statement and reached for some kimchi. It wasn’t as spicy or as flavorful here in America.

“Oh, I hope the food’s okay,” Sehwan muttered, somewhat sheepish. “I know it’s not up to par with what you get back home, but this is what we have to make do with.”  

“It’s _fine,_ hyung,” Donghyun insisted, covering his mouth once more. “I have everything under control here and the food is good. Isn’t that right, Daehwi?”

Daehwi looked up with wide eyes, his favorite flavored (grape) popsicle held midway in his mouth. He hadn’t heard the question – and even if he did, the boy probably wouldn’t have understood given his very limited Korean – because he was too absorbed in the video playing on Sehwan’s phone.

Sehwan chuckled, taking his keys. “My office number is on the fridge. Call me if you need anything.”

“Yes, hyung.”

“ _Bye, Daehwi!_ ” Sehwan said, in English, his voice raising in pitch.

Daehwi didn’t respond, too engrossed in the talking penguin on the screen to even acknowledge his father leaving.

“ _Daehwi._ ” Donghyun said with an awkward grin. “ _Your dad is leaving, don’t you want to say goodbye?_ ”

Daehwi laughed at something the penguin said, happily nibbling on the ice cream that was a few degrees away from melting all over his shirt.

Donghyun chuckled, hoping Sehwan wouldn’t be too peeved. “He’s a stubborn one, isn’t he?”

Sehwan sighed in defeat. “I’ll get going. Thanks again, Donghyun.”

“Safe travels.”

The door shut with a click and Donghyun continued his dinner. Despite the kimchi being somewhat bland, the meat was fantastic and with the way Sehwan had marinated it, it could rival the nice ajumma’s barbeque stand back in Daejeon. A bowl and a half later and after gorging down his fill, he turned a skeptical eye at Daehwi, who was still giggling at the phone screen.

“ _Daehwi._ ” Donghyun called. “ _I’m finished, so can you help me clean up?_ ”

Daehwi perked up and set down the phone for the first time since Sehwan had left. “ _You can just leave it, Dad will clean it up later._ ”

“ _Your dad will be tired when he comes home_ ,” Donghyun admonished.

When Daehwi didn’t respond and continued watching the penguin talk to its friends, Donghyun continued. “ _We should help him out. That’s what good kids do, right?_ ”

Nothing.

“ _Daehwi._ ” Donghyun warned, but the boy could not care less, so Donghyun decided to resort to bartering.

“ _Daehwi, if you help me clean up, I will buy you a present. For your birthday,_ ” he added for extra measure. He was going to buy a present regardless, but Daehwi didn’t need to know that.

Daehwi looked up. “ _A present? What kind of present?_ ”

Donghyun grinned. “ _It’s a surprise, silly. I’ll buy you a very nice present,_ _but_ only _if you help me wash the dishes before your dad comes back. Deal?_ ”

Daehwi turned off the phone and let it fall against the wood of the table, scurrying out of his seat to carry Donghyun’s empty bowl over to the sink.

“ _Thank you, Daehwi._ ” Donghyun smiled, proud that he was able to pull the kid away from the virtual distractions.

As Donghyun washed while Daehwi dried (sort of), Donghyun began to consider planning what he was going to do tomorrow. He was currently on vacation in America, in Washington, D.C. to be exact, one of the most popular cities in the country with it being the capital and all. He was contemplating going to the Smithsonian Museum when the door opened, signaling a visitor.

 _“Hello?”_ Donghyun called out, but didn’t hear a response. _“Daehwi, stay here while I go see who it is.”_

Donghyun took one of the hand cloths hanging by the sink and wiped his hands as he went out to the living room.

When he entered, he saw a taller dark-haired male taking off his shoes with a grunt. The man was currently hunched over, weighed down by his large and bulky backpack. In his ears were earbuds that blasted a deafening beat that no doubt cancelled all other sounds, so he didn’t even realize Donghyun was standing before him.

 _“Hi,”_ Donghyun greeted again, this time with a wave and catching the other by surprise. _“Are you another one of Sehwan’s guests?”_

The male quirked an eyebrow as he took out his earbuds – _and yep, that music was loud_ – for a brief second before registering that Donghyun was speaking in English.

“A-ah…” The man stuttered, taking out his phone and tapping furiously at the screen. He held up a pointer finger, telling Donghyun to wait.

After a moment, the man held his phone out to Donghyun and an automated voice came out.

_“Hello. My. Name. Is. Youngmin. Im.”_

_Young…min,_ Donghyun repeated the name in his head and made a wild guess.

“Are you Korean?” Donghyun asked, switching between the languages with ease.

Youngmin brightened immediately and put on a huge grin. “Oh, are you Korean too?”

“I am, indeed,” Donghyun said, already feeling more comfortable with the stranger. “I’m Kim Donghyun, from Daejeon. It’s nice to meet you.” Donghyun gave a slight bow in greeting.

“It’s nice to meet you, too.” Youngmin bowed as well. “I’m Im Youngmin and I hail from Busan.”

“I knew it,” Donghyun said with a gleam in his eye. “Your satoori is pretty apparent.”

Youngmin chuckled, taking his backpack off and placing it gently in the corner.

“Do you speak English?” Donghyun inquired.

“Barely,” Youngmin said, shaking his head. “I’m better at listening than speaking it honestly. You seem pretty fluent, though?”

Donghyun chuckled. “I studied it in school for five years, but only now am I actually putting it to use.”

“That’s better than me, I’m sure.”

 _“Donghyun!”_ Daehwi called, running out into the living room. _“I finished putting all the dishes away!”_

 _“Very_ good _, Daehwi,”_ Donghyun said, enjoying how the boy grinned even more with the praise.

Daehwi turned to the new arrival. _“Who’s this?”_

“Ah,” Donghyun said, sending a glance towards Youngmin. “Do you want to introduce yourself?”

Youngmin chuckled, bending down to match Daehwi eye to eye. He held out a hand. _“Hello. I am Youngmin. What’s your name?”_

 _“I’m Daehwi,”_ Daehwi said, eyeing the other’s hand skeptically for a moment before hesitantly placing his tiny hand against his palm. _“Are you staying here too?_ ”

 _“Yes,”_ Youngmin said, faltering as his vocabulary fizzled away. _“Uh…yes. Uhh…”_

Donghyun almost burst into laughter as Youngmin sent a pleading look to help salvage the situation.

_“Daehwi, do we have any ice cream left?”_

Daehwi thought for a bit before chirping, _“I think so!”_

 _“How about you go check,”_ Donghyun suggested. _“And if there’s any left, you can give some to our new friend here.”_

Daehwi nodded once and scampered off into the kitchen.

 _“And one for me, too!_ ” Donghyun turned back to the visitor. “You’re not allergic to ice cream, right?”

Youngmin raised an eyebrow. “No?”

“Good, because I told Daehwi to get you some.”

“I wasn’t hungry,” Youngmin muttered. “But thanks, I guess.”

“It’ll take a while. Daehwi likes to mull over which flavors he likes before actually eating them. Just saying, he’ll probably give you the one he likes the least.”

“Gee, thanks.” Youngmin looked around. “Where’s, uhh…”

“Sehwan-hyung?”

“Yes. Where is he?”

Donghyun led Youngmin over to the dining table. “He’s out to do some work, but he’ll be back soon. Tea?” Donghyun gestured towards the teapot that still had steam rising out from the top.

Youngmin shook his head. “I’m fine. He left you to babysit his kid?”

“The kid’s cute,” Donghyun said, a bit defensive. Donghyun enjoyed spending time with kids and Daehwi was a sweetheart (most of the time).

“He doesn’t speak Korean,” Youngmin said, concern laced in his words. “Is his dad gonna teach him?”

Donghyun shrugged. “Heck if I know. I mean, I’m fine practicing my English either way.”

Youngmin didn’t say more. Daehwi padded back into the living room, adorably holding out two popsicles in his hands. Donghyun could see the bright colors of the ice cream peeking through the translucent white wrapper.

 _“Thank you, Daehwi,”_ Donghyun said, as Daehwi gave the yellow one to him and the pink one to Youngmin.

 _“Thank you._ ” Youngmin gratefully took the popsicle from the boy and opened the wrapper, grinning with anticipation.

Upon opening, however, a strong whiff wafted towards Donghyun’s nose, causing him to jerk back in shock and disgust.

“Agh…! _Daehwi, what is—_ ” Daehwi turned and ran towards his room before Donghyun could say anything else. Youngmin gave a questioning glance as Donghyun realized, “The brat gave me durian!”

Youngmin snickered. “Lovely.” He took a test lick and his eyes widened in pleasant surprise, “He gave me strawberry.”

“Ugh. _No present for you!”_ Donghyun screeched, already imagining Daehwi giggling evilly under the covers.

“Oh, I should tell Sehwan-hyung that I’m here,” Youngmin said, reaching for his phone.

“How long are you here for?” Donghyun asked as he took tentative licks of his abomination of a popsicle while grimacing.

Youngmin sent a quick text message. “Uh…three days? Four days? I’ll have to check.”

“Check?”

“Yeah, so I’m meeting up with some friends over in Baltimore later. We’re going to the aquarium and we want to see the harbor, but I don’t know when we’re actually going.”

Donghyun gave a look that screamed, _Y’all suck at planning…_ He couldn’t do anything without a plan, especially not in a foreign country.

Youngmin laughed. “We like to go with the flow.”

“I see.” Youngmin happily took a bite out of his ice cream. “Well, I was thinking of going to the Smithsonian tomorrow,” Donghyun said, nonchalant. “You’re welcome to join me if you’d like. Assuming you’re not doing anything else, I mean.”

Youngmin pursed his lips, “Ooh, that sounds like a great idea. Anything particular you wanted to see?”

“Not really,” Donghyun made a disgusted face at having accidentally bitten off a piece of frozen durian. “Okay, I think I’m done with this.”

“You’ve barely even licked it!” Youngmin said, scandalized at the waste of perfectly good ice cream.

“Do _you_ want it?” Donghyun pointed the offensive dessert towards the other, feeling a wave of satisfaction when Youngmin leaned back with a vigorous shake of his head. “Didn’t think so.”

Donghyun stomped over to the trash bin and chucked his ice cream into the abyss.

“The kid’s going to be disappointed,” Youngmin teased.

“Whatever.” Donghyun gingerly wiped his hands with a napkin. “Anyway, what time should we go tomorrow?”

“Depends on when I wake up,” Youngmin grinned. “Shall I set up an alarm?”

Donghyun hummed. “Let’s go at 10:00.”

“ _10:00?_ ”

“10:30?”

“Kim Donghyun, I’ll have you know I tend to wake up past noon.”

Donghyun scoffed. “The earlier we go, the more we get to see.”

Youngmin gave a look.

“I want to take pictures, Youngmin. Lots of them. With minimal crowds as possible, and D.C. is notorious for bad traffic during lunch time.”

Youngmin narrowed his eyes. “Hold up, you did _not_ just call me ‘Youngmin.’ I am almost certain I am older than you.”

“This is America,”  Donghyun retorted. “We don’t do honorifics here.”

“We’re still Korean, you brat!” Youngmin said with a disbelieving chuckle. “What year were you born in?”

“1998.”

“I was right, I _am_ older,” Youngmin said, biting off a piece of his strawberry popsicle with vigor.

“ _Being older does not correlate to a measure of aptitude,_ ” Donghyun shot back.

Youngmin blinked. “I don’t know what you just said, but I think I was just insulted.”

Donghyun grinned, deciding not to comment. “Think what you want.”

Youngmin huffed, equal parts impressed and envious of the younger’s English skills. But at the same time, he could see Donghyun eyeing his ice cream with a subtle jealousy, so…short-term wins, right?

“Cool, so are we good for 10:30?”

Youngmin shrugged. “Throw a pillow at my door if I’m still sleeping.”

Donghyun smirked. “Gladly.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- I have a soft spot for travel-related stories/fics/scenarios. Hotels are very poetic to me.
> 
> \- Talk to me here! | ask.fm/taesquared


	10. good for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- The song in question is “Good For You” from the musical Dear Evan Hansen (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5B9RWJor4c). The context is completely different to what I’m using it for in this drabble, but lyrically I always thought it would fit with these themes.

**University AU / Angst / 1030 words.**

*******

Youngmin won’t tell you that the day started out like any other because he _hates_ cliches, hates them with a burning passion.  

He’ll admit that when he got the news from Sewoon, he was laying in his bed, playing a game on his phone which, sure, was fairly normal for a typical Wednesday afternoon.

It’s never a good sign when you get a message saying, _“We need to talk.”_

Youngmin begrudgingly stops his streak to tap on the notification when he receives another one.

_“You deserve to know.”_

Youngmin raises an eyebrow and doesn’t expect the paragraph of text from the usually concise messages he gets from his best friend.  

He reads.

No, he skims.

And then he reads.

He reads it again.

He reads it one more time.

And he imagines this is what it’s like for poor, innocent bugs when they’re suddenly trapped by a glass jar slamming down on the pavement from above.

Like air is suddenly limited.

Like every other sound in the room is suddenly muffled.

Like your vision is suddenly growing hazy from the shock.

Sewoon doesn’t add anything else. How can he? He’s said everything Youngmin needed, no, _deserved_ to know.

He’s sorry.

It’s the most emotion Youngmin had ever witnessed coming from Sewoon’s texts.

Donghyun was cheating on him. With some guy named Daniel. Youngmin knows the guy.

Oh.

Youngmin doesn’t respond.

He tosses his phone across the room, chucking it gently against the wall.

He collapses on his bed. Right on top of the blanket.

He falls asleep. Leaves Sewoon on read.

He knows Sewoon will understand.

***

He doesn’t cry until much later when Sewoon comes over after his classes.

His friend offers to do the breaking up over the phone after Youngmin had cried his throat sore for almost thirty minutes.

So he does.

Leave it to Sewoon to keep things cruelly short. He doesn’t even give Donghyun the breath to explain himself. Donghyun doesn’t deserve that.

Youngmin feels like falling asleep again, but Jaehwan comes over shortly after for extra moral support.

***

It’s amazing what one can achieve when fueled by emotions.

Youngmin would’ve never imagined being here, standing in the middle of the stage and staring in awe at the wavy sliver of light peeking through the bottom from the other side of the curtain. He can hear whispers past the announcer’s booming voice and wonders if Donghyun is out there.  

He scoffs. He shouldn’t care.

Donghyun didn’t. So why should he?

He ignores the rational voice in his head that says, _yes, he does care_ , but he pushes past the hurt and the betrayal and tries to focus on taking deep breaths. He was about to perform. Time to channel those emotions into the proper place.

_“Our next performer is Lim Youngmin! Please give him a warm round of applause!”_

Youngmin takes a final breath as the curtain opens and he is momentarily blinded by the spotlight shining directly on him.

The applause dies down and all 500-something eyes are right on him at this moment. He hears a few whistles from the crowd as they inspect his outfit and get-up for the night. He grins a lopsided smile; he knows he looks good. He had pulled out _the_ suit for this performance, the one he reserved for special, Instagram-worthy, once-a-year occasions.

So what if it was just a school competition? He was heartbroken. _Fuck off_ , and let him do what he wants to regain even a miniscule amount of the self-esteem Donghyun had taken and shattered.

As he waits for the song to start – _Tech crew, get your shit together!_ – he tries to hide his smirk when he recognizes Jaehwan’s distinct voice cheering him on.

_“I love you, hyung! You got this!”_

The piercing lights on him make the audience look like a blur of faces, but he could just imagine Sewoon cringing in the seat next to his boyfriend. Another voice – someone he probably doesn’t know – goads him into reacting by obnoxiously whooping in response to Jaehwan’s call, but Youngmin is too busy listening for the guitar strum to give the guy the satisfaction of being bothered.

Finally it starts, and he sings.

> _“So you found a place where the grass is greener_
> 
> _And you jumped the fence to the other side_
> 
> _Is it good?_
> 
> _Are they giving you a world I could never provide?”_

He knew he wasn’t going to win. No one ever wins with an instrumental track playing in the background. Something about being raw and authentic or some bullshit, but Youngmin couldn’t care less. Winning wasn’t the point tonight and without the added pressure, he could actually let go.

He suddenly wishes that Donghyun _was_ out in the audience. Ong Seongwoo was performing later and he was good friends with Daniel, right?

Youngmin sneers into the next verse. If Daniel was such an _awesome_ boyfriend, he should’ve invited Donghyun to come (and in more ways than one).

> _“Does it cross your mind to be slightly sorry_
> 
> _Do you even care that you might be wrong?_
> 
> _Was it fun?_
> 
> _Well I hope you had a blast while you dragged me along…”_

_God, I wish you were here._ Youngmin grits his teeth in anticipation and takes a breath to dive into the chorus. What he wouldn’t give to see Donghyun’s face right now.

Despite this being his first time singing in front of more than two people, he finds it exhilarating more than anything. His makeup and outfit were definitely helping and he finally gets the whole adrenaline thing. It’s addicting.

He feels his heart racing as he goes into the key change and basks in the climax. The track plays the overlapping voice of a boy who is trying so, _so_ desperately to fix what was already broken.

He could hear Donghyun in that boy and he sounds so pathetic, it makes him want to laugh.

The audience is reacting better to him than the dude who sang before him, so he’s probably screaming something that makes sense. (What if he actually places?)

He smirks. He ends with a growl as the final chord plays.

_“So you got what you’ve always wanted.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- Not that there was any point of contention but Youngmin CAN sing so don’t @ me
> 
> \- I’m in a bad mood so this was me venting a bit and sharing some of my love for Dear Evan Hansen. I highly, highly recommend the soundtrack – “Good For You” and “Requiem” are my absolute favorites.
> 
> \- Talk to me here! | ask.fm/taesquared


	11. final warning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- Warning: a lot of crass language up ahead.

**University AU / Angst / 725 words.**

*******

One minute Youngmin was leaning against the bar, sipping his beer as he kept an eye on Jaehwan and Sewoon from across the room.

The next he was almost spilling his drink as he was suddenly dragged by the arm into the back hallway.

“What the _— Donghyun?_ ”

“Shut up.”

“The _fuck_ , let me _g_ —!”

Without warning, Donghyun shoved him up against the nearest wall and desperately kissed his lips before attacking his neck, immediately nipping and sucking along the sensitive skin around his jugular vein.

“Wai—” Youngmin stuttered, still trying to process what was happening in his slightly tipsy haze. When he realized that his cheating _ex_ -boyfriend was trying to put a hand down his pants, he reached down to grab his wrists before he could go any further. “Donghyun, what the _f—_ ”

“ _Shut. Up.”_ Youngmin yelped with a hiss as Donghyun began to painfully bite and twist the skin between his teeth, leaving angry red marks that would definitely bruise later.

“ _Fucking—_ ” With a growl, Youngmin mustered up his remaining strength and flipped their positions so that he could now hold Donghyun’s shoulders against the wall and keep him somewhat stable. Under the dim light of the bar, Donghyun’s face twisted into a mix of frustration and desperation, all half shrouded in shadow.

Donghyun tried to resist but Youngmin’s grip was firm.

“What the _hell_ are you doing,” he muttered, anger beginning to churn in his stomach.

Donghyun didn’t meet his gaze. “What does it _look_ like I’m doing.”

“Is this what you’ve resorted to? Donghyun, we’re _over_ ,” Youngmin spat, furious. “What gives you the fucking right?”

Donghyun didn’t respond.

“ _Kim Donghyun._ ”

Donghyun fiercely shook his shoulders, trying to twist out of his grip.

“Answer me.” Youngmin pushed him against the wall once more, his voice dropping with menace. “Or I’ll tell Jonghyun and the police to ban you from ever coming in here again on the count of harassment.”

Donghyun chuckled, a sinister sound escaping from his lips. “I’d like to see you fucking try.”

Youngmin glared.

“You’re all talk, hyung,” Donghyun drawled. “I always hated that about you.”

Youngmin disregarded the comment with a malicious smile. “Where’s Daniel? Or was his dick not worth your cheating ass that you had to scope out an old flame again? _Oh, you poor thing._ ”

A look of surprise flashed across Donghyun’s gaze before a smirk took over.

“Love is dead, I guess,” he said, cold and piercing. He leaned into Youngmin’s space once more, backing him up against the opposite wall. He held an arm against the wall, trapping the elder.

“But I’ll give you that,” he muttered, his lips brushing up against the familiar juncture of Youngmin’s collarbones. He raised a finger to his chin, tilting it to the side. The faint traces of his cologne wafted as he nosed his way across the line of his jaw.

“Your dick was _far_ superior to Daniel’s.”

He chuckled darkly.

_“What I’d give to have it all to myself again.”_

Youngmin shoved the younger towards the ground in a violent fury, startling a few bystanders who were looking for the bathroom.

“Don’t you _fucking_ dare,” he said, his words searing with venom. “Don’t you even _think_ of trying to play me again, you piece of shit. Who do you think you are, coming in here and trying to get me to have sex with you when you couldn’t even give me the _decency_ of telling me that you were screwing some other dude to my face, and now you’re bored of him and you fucking _think_ I would humor you with my God-given dick?”

He laughed, incredulous.

“You. You’re really something, Kim Donghyun.”

He reached down to grab a fistful of Donghyun’s collar, snarling in his face. “I’m only going to say this once, and I fucking mean it. Don’t _ever_ look for me again. Stay far the hell away from me or I swear to God, I will _not_ let you leave with your pretty face.”

_“Sir, is everything alright?”_

Youngmin paid the bodyguard no mind as he threw the younger back towards the ground.

“Have some respect for yourself and leave before I get someone to throw you out. And trust me.” His voice rang dangerously as he headed back out to the main room.

“This is your final warning.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- I promise, I love Donghyun. I should really start writing some fluff to make up for all the angst.
> 
> \- If you don't already know, I got a new Twitter! You can follow me there if you wish @ eyesofjihoon
> 
> \- I started my full-time job and I'm struggling to balance my other stories so updates will be slow. :( 
> 
> \- Talk to me here! | ask.fm/taesquared


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